Hiro in New York

Heroes is sooo good. :D Glad att det började på "normal" tv, så jag kan se det. Hiro är bäst! :D Asball. Watching it made me wanna start drawing manga again, cause it's like comics-inspirated.
I don't know what I feel or want. Or think. Feel my fingers typing, moving over the keyboard, seeing the words, know they will be out there, for everyone to read. There was a time when I wanted to hide, I didn't want anyone to notice me, or know me. I became a ghost. Then I got so depressed (understatement) cause of the lack of love and companionship. So I tried another path. I wanted to be loved. By everyone. Be seen and popular and stuff. I messed up, got the wrong kind of attention, it all turned so negative. (Reminded me that I can put up the Sherpa's speech now) Anyways, negative is the keyword. Many still dislike me today for that, everything I've done, and everything that happened. Now I don't know where I stand. I don't want either. I want to write. I want to read. I want to draw.

The Sherpa's speech:
The Earth is moving. Did you feel that? Everything. All the time. Dimensions we can't even see. Everything is evolving. Turtle, you're a dove.
Turtle: That's cool. Can I hit that, Sherp? Thanks.
Eric: You afraid of getting busted?
The Sherpa: Busted? I'm entrusted, man. I don't steal. I heal. We're not getting stoned. We're getting honed. My probation officer's one of my best customers. I'm a prisoner. I'm a prisoner of, uh, war. War on drugs. It's all so negative, man. I mean, the Man's most positive positive-tive is a nega-tive. It's a mega-nega-tive. Right? [shouts] Viking Quest! Let them be low. We are getting high. We're not getting fucked down. We're getting fucked up.

Pure love on that one. Nightie, Sherp!

Comme fânent les roses...

Meaning of life. We all make our own life meaningful. By doing things we love, make us feel good, happy, enjoying things, fulfilling. Animals and plants have their meaning programmed into their DNA, they know exactly what their purpose here is, and they fulfill it, every day. Maybe the hidden part, the one we haven't been able to decrypt yet, of our DNA is the humans "meaning of life". We seems to have lost it somewhere in evolution. Or maybe we were given a choice. Choose your own destiny. As I see it, there is no "purpose" to universe, life and everything. It's just a bunch of events, chances taken and chances lost, random, and now we're here. And we're demanding so many answers from outside when we really have them ourselves. If you look at a life. You have so and so much time. Varsågod. Do what you want with it. Onlly you yourself who can decide how you want to spend that time, purpose or not. That is the meaning. You choose your own meaning. Living realising this, or living, thinking you are "forced" to do stuff cause someone told you to do it, or every one else does it, why should I be different. Conscious choosing. Everything you do and say affect your surroundings. We go around thinking we are meaningless, what we do doesn't make any difference in the large sense, we can't affect the world. It does all the difference! Cause if you start thinking, then others might start thinking, and we're on the way to solving our environmental problems or finding a sustainable way to make poverty history. Make your choices. Live.

Go around, seeking happiness, buying new things, getting another job, moving to a new apartment. True happiness lies in making other people happy.

Quelqu'un M'a Dit - Carla Bruni

On me dit que nos vies ne valent pas grand chose,
Elles passent en un instant comme fanent les roses.
On me dit que le temps qui glisse est un salaud que de nos chagrins il s'en fait des manteaux pourtant quelqu'un m'a dit...

Que tu m'aimais encore,
C'est quelqu'un qui m'a dit que tu m'aimais encore.
Serais ce possible alors ?

On me dit que le destin se moque bien de nous
Qu'il ne nous donne rien et qu'il nous promet tout
Parais qu'le bonheur est à portée de main,
Alors on tend la main et on se retrouve fou
Pourtant quelqu'un m'a dit ...

Mais qui est ce qui m'a dit que toujours tu m'aimais?
Je ne me souviens plus c'était tard dans la nuit,
J'entend encore la voix, mais je ne vois plus les traits
"Il vous aime, c'est secret, lui dites pas que j'vous l'ai dit"
Tu vois quelqu'un m'a dit...

Que tu m'aimais encore, me l'a t'on vraiment dit...
Que tu m'aimais encore, serais ce possible alors ?

Can we live a life of peace and happiness?

Travailler plus pour gagner plus pour acheter plus pour polluer plus? Cela rappelle la chanson d'Alain Souchon:

Oh la la la vie en rose
Le rose qu'on nous propose
D'avoir les quantités d'choses
Qui donnent envie d'autre chose
Aïe, on nous fait croire
Que le bonheur c'est d'avoir
De l'avoir plein nos armoires...

Basicly saying work more, to get more money to buy more things, to pollute more. And that we think we will find happiness in things, in overflowing homes. Read this article about Sarkozy, another one from the one before that was so difficult and boring. This one you could actually understand, and I found these beautiful lyrics, la vie en rose. That's a movie aswell, about Edith Piaff, I'm gonna check that out when I have time.

Met one of mum's friends in town. Got really surprised, like what-are-you-doing-here? Apparently she's gonna read some course in Lund now, said we should grab a coffee or something someday. I really like her. Love even. She's really warm, a wonderful person, she smiles with all her face, you feel so welcome and loved. To me, she is the ultimate mother. Walking sunshine. Yes, we definitely have to go fika-ing, I would love that.

Breaking Benjamin. Listened to them today, all day. Beautiful lyrics, find myself in them.

(parts of "Until the End" - Breaking Benjamin)
Why give up, why give in?
It's not enough, it never is.
So I will go on until the end.

I've lost my way.
I've lost my way, but I will go on until the end.

The final fight I'll win

"Unknown soldier" by Breaking Benjamin

Border line,
Dead inside.
I don't mind,
Falling to pieces.
Count me in, violent
Let's begin, feeding the sickness.
How do I simplify,
Dislocate - the enemy's on the way.

Show me what it's like
To dream in black and white,
So I can leave this world tonight.

Full of fear,
Ever clear.
I'll be here,
Fighting forever.
Curious,
Venomous,
You'll find me
Climbing to heaven.
Never mind,
Turn back time.
You'll be fine - I will get left behind.

Holding on too tight.
Breathe the breath of life,
So I can leave this world behind.

It only hurts just once.
They're only broken bones.
Hide the hate inside.

Oh.

Forever ... one
I'll be fine

Holding on too tight.
Breathe the breath of life,
So I can leave this world behind.

(parts of "You fight me" - Breaking Benjamin)

I don't know what I want to be yet.
But I can show that I need to see this.
No time for lies and empty fights.
I'm on your side.

Can we live a life of peace and happiness?
I don't think so.

No denying I am scared to lose the things I love.
I'm in control.

Everyone is waiting here for everyone.
Leave me alone.

Outside of your own mind

Several currently well-known people have attended it, among whom are actor Max von Sydow and several high ranking politicians.

Detta är då min skola. Najs. Eller "status" som j sa.

Rise Against - Alive and well (don't like the actual song that much, but the lyrics are beautiful)

now's the time
to rearrange your life
live for something
outside of your own mind
we all dream
the same dream everynight
to burn the world that you call civilized

alive and well
i live to be alive
i live to always strive
for something more
alive and well
i'll never understand
the who, what, why or when
of you tonight...

Läser biology. ECM is the ToK of biology, the extra cellular matrix tells the cell where it is in time and space, it reminds the cells of who they are.

Money is the law, the religion, the god. I don't have either of these things, does that make me a criminal?

Pimp my baby, reklam för bebiskläder, är inte det att ta uttrycket pimp lite väl långt? Just asking...

Open up your mind and then open up your heart.

I smiled and tried to mean it, to make myself let go

Always dreaming of being somewhere else. Being something more than I am. Always doubting the choices made. What are we doing here?

(Timbuktu - Ett brev)
Jag sa idag, vänta inte det är redan sent
Gå mot strömmen, ändra reglerna i deras spel.

(Rise Against - Worth dying for)
We've been battered so hard that
We don't feel anymore

Take me
From this world
Save me
What if we
All die young

(Rise Against - Roadside)
And tell me how I'm supposed to feel,
When all these nightmares become real;
'Cause I don't know

And I don't know how we separate the lies here from the truth;
And I don't know how we woke up one day and somehow thought we knew
exactly what we're supposed to do.

So leave me at the roadside,
And hang me up and out to dry.

(Mika - Any other world)
In any other world
You could tell the difference
And let it all unfurl
Into broken remnants

Smile like you mean it
And let yourself let go

'Cause it's all in the hands of a bitter, bitter man
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Take a bow, play the part of a Lonely, lonely heart
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
To the world you thought you lived in

I tried to live alone
But lonely is so lonely, alone
So human as I am
I had to give up my defenses

So I smiled and tried to mean it
To make myself let go

(The Beatles - Yesterday)
Yesterday,
All my troubles seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

As always it's the music that inspires me. KuddLudd if you're reading this, you got to check out Rise Against. They're amazing, and if you like My Chem and Less than jake, you're gonna love them. :)

Jobbade på Världsbutiken, took a train back and forth, I have T-plus now, waow. Makes for easy train-hopping.
Läste ut Medea, så nu ska jag börja skriva lite notes som kan förbereda mig till den comparative essay som vi ska skriva i A1. Hittade ett tema jag vill påpeka i dramat, inte kvinna vs man, utan något mer generellt. You'll see, you'll see... Ååh saknar Gollum jättemycket. Måste bjuda över Sara på ett Lord of the Rings marathon...