Spa & beautiful lyrics

Therme i Vals. Train from Zurich to Chur. From Chur to Ilinz. Then bus from Ilinz to Vals. It was beautiful. Refuse to partake in superfluos wordspilling. The mountains can speak for themselves. Varm källa. Svarta granitväggar. Vit badrock. Mjuka tofflor. Schweizisk choklad. Det var himmel.

Men saknade hörlurar till iPoden så kunde inte lyssna på musik.. :( Envy on the coast:

Tell them that she's not scared

I'll hold your tears as a ransom
Within the palm of my hand,
And tell you once again,
Don't tell me that you're scared...

Wake, wake, wake her
From this sea of white linens and
Extract the drugs from her dreams
And sew her seams with delicateness,
'Cause beneath her chest sits the heart that I live for,
You'd kill for,
The angels would die for.
And with a subtle wink and a flutter of wings,
They whispered,
They whispered...

...Because all suffering is sweet to me

You're not supposed to know of this
You're not supposed to feel a thing
But I've seen how they tear you apart
The alcohol recovery
The words that cripple
And whispers that sting

Little boys and girls raise themselves
With tenderness, yeah, and age

She started steps through dreams
And to relatives it seems
That history just hasn't happened yet
You're more than this to me
You're worth more than you can see
I don't care what the books had, girl
You didn't die in vain

I found you hanging on their words
From the noose you let them
Tie around your neck
It took thirteen years for you
But you count the rest of the aches and pains
And medicines mean nothing
If you can't feel your skin

Starving Your Friends

Thanks a lot i've been disadvantaged from the start
he constricted the veins heading straight to my head
rerouted the blood to my heart instead
rerouted the blood to my heart instead

i am brain dead thinking strictly in blues and reds
oh i'm in enough trouble man
oh man i'm in trouble again
cause everyones ears are watching me
and i never ever felt that this would be
anything more then a makeshift personal IV

cause i fall three times as hard if its for nothing at all
you all seem twice as tall as i will ever be
and i feel terribly small when my head works too hard
when you think with your chest theres not a thing that you don't see

i'm hardly capable of half the damage that i would like to do
i could swear that i don't care
but you know that i'm too full of shit to think this through
so look at me
i pray to god but curse too much to be considered true
i'm just like me, i'm just like to me, so who the hell are you?

i'm but a boy just like the rest of these things
[Starving Your Friends Lyrics on http://www.lyricsmania.com]
and i borrow phrases from dusty faded record sleeves
the story is the same i've just personalized the name
but if it's all you need then i'd be more then happy to confess my steam

cause i fall three times as hard if its for nothing at all
you all seem twice as tall as i will ever be
and i feel terribly small when my head works too hard
when you think with your chest theres not a thing that you don't see

i'm hardly capable of half the damage that i would like to do
i could swear that i don't care
but you know that i'm too full of shit to think this through
so look at me
i pray to god but curse too much to be considered true
i'm just like me, i'm just like to me so, who the hell are you?

i know you think you know but these eyelids are in domes
that shut you out from all the things that i don't want you to know
and i refuse to tell you one single secret i own
cause you'll find i'm petrified of your eyes

i'm hardly capable of half the damage that i would like to do
i could swear that i don't care
but you know that i'm too full of shit to think this through
so look at me
i read the book i prayed to god but curse too much to be considered true
i'm just like me, i'm just like to me so, who the hell are you?

Chiodos - I didn't say I was powerful, I said I was a wizard

I'm not the one that you want, i'll only let you down.
and i'm pretty sure that you've caught on.
and you can save it all
i'm just feeling sorry for my

i think it's every time i look into a room
pure silence so sudden but i sooth to hear it

context saying that you are the rain on the parade
and how long could you hang on to a word
tell me how long how could you hang on to a word

i'm not the one that you want; i'll only let you down.
and i'm pretty sure that you've caught on.
and you can save it all
i'm just feeling sorry for myself

but maybe it's all eyes on you; in love with ego and attention
the eyes that are just begging me for more
this is gone and i can see it.
your head is full of words, full of words that don't mean anything

and how long could you hang on to a word
tell me how long could you hang on to a word

Can't tell heads from tails

Voices in my head
I cry, I plead
Why can I never have
the life I try to lead

Trying is all I achieve
I'm stuck, I'm broke
Your poisoning anger
makes me choke...

Beginning of a song I'm writing. As with all my projects, they all end up half-finished.

Broken, unbroken, fixed by a fix
Will ever the world turn right
I can’t even tell heads from tails
And all I see is the endless night

Listening to Madina Lake and Envy on the coast. Envy on the coast = love. Some songs that really get stuck. Mood-fitting. Tell them that she's not scared...

Now I have to start thinking about WL1, and the maths test tomorrow, which I'm probably gonna fail. high five.

And I'll take the truth at any cost

Right now, in my ears: Paramore, Finger Eleven and Ash. Twilight of the Innocents is a really good album. :3 Otherwise I've been writing songs. I don't know what became of them really, I just wrote and sent to the persons they belonged to. "I almost wrote a song about you today, but then I tore it all apart and I threw it away..." Some persons are so easy to write about. Some I realise I don't know well enough to write about. Even though I would want to.

Finger Eleven - Paralyzer

Well I’m not paralyzed
But I seem to be struck by you
I wanna make you move
Because you’re standing still
If your body matches
What your eyes can do
You’ll probably move right through
Me on my way to you

Paramore - We are Broken

I am outside,
And I've been waiting for the sun.
With my wide eyes,
I've seen worlds that don't belong.

My mouth is dry,
With words I cannot verbalize.
Tell me why,
We live like this.

Keep me safe inside,
Your arms like towers.
Tower over me, yeah.

'Cause we are broken.
What must we do to restore,
Our innocence,
And all the promise we adored?
Give us life again,
Cause we just wanna be whole.

Lock the doors,
'Cause I'd like to capture this voice.
It came to me tonight,
So everyone will have a choice.

And under red lights,
I'll show myself it wasn't forged.
We're at war,
We live like this...

Tea with Sara

So. Here we are again. Loosing, always loosing. Downloading music to put in our ears, tunes in our heads, words echoing. If I had known what you are all going through, I would hug you hard and never let go. I would do that anyways. Sometimes I think I'm too shy to do that, what if people don't want that hug. Come on, who the fuck doesn't need a hug now and then.. Anyways. Every day is like a piece. A tiny tiny piece of broken glass. Without context, without meaning really. Well there is like a glimmer of meaning in each little piece, those special moments. Like laughing at a really stupid joke between classes. Like listening to a really good song and sing really really loud, not caring what others in the basement might think. Like tea with Sara. I think I'll write a song called Tea with Sara. The sweetest song ever. What would I do without you...

CUTE is what we aim for. <3

Newport Living

And if you lie you don't deserve to have friends
If you lie you don't deserve to have them

The social scene where she gets her fix
Has been broken since '86
Now just look at that social clique
Do you really wanna be a part of it?
Let's not let us forget
Where she gets the habit
She gets the pills from her skills
She gets the skills from the pills
And just look at that clique
Do you really wanna be the star of it?

Lyrical Lies

And you want to be dressed in poetry
But imagery doesn't fit
And you want resizing
But darling dear get a grip

And I think what I just wrote is going over my head
I'm stealing lines from myself
And what I said was never said
It's just a lyrical lie
Made up in my mind

I'm the darling dear that should get a grip. And I'm making lyrical lies. Poetry is fun.

Can someone break my glass cube?

Ever had the feeling of beeing prisoner inside a cube of glass? All the walls are glass, the ceiling, the floor, everything around you, and there’s no way out, just solid glass. You are invisible, no one can see you. You beat your fists against the walls, hurl your body into it, every part of your body is working to get out. But your efforts are meaningless, solid flesh beating against blunt glass, smashing, crushing grinding yourself into a bloody mess. Fall exhausted on the transparent floor, slippery of dark red. Couldn’t anyone just come and break it? Break my glass cube! You shout, you scream, you beg, you plead, you cry, your voice turns so course you cough blood. A desert in your throat, grinding away. It’s like offering your heart to someone, painfully tearing it out of your chest, repeatedly offering it, without acceptance, you throw it at the person, and with a loud splash it slides down and ends up on the street. A car passes, blood spurts, and the heart is no more. That is the cube. Isolated, alone, desperate to get out. Can’t somebody just break…

I have seen too many movies
I have read too many books
I’m the kind that sees sun and brings an umbrella
I have been to fortune tellers

Closeness is my greatest addiction. I love booze, true, I can become someone else, someone outside all my ISSUES. Someone happy, someone fun. But closeness beats that, those little moments. Sometimes it seems I have feelings, sometimes it seems I have not. Emptiness is a constantly resurfacing state. Hey there Delilah...

I don't believe in love. I don't know who might be reading this, I just don't, and I don't know if I've ever felt it. I doubt everything. I see signs, I doubt them, I get a hunch, doubt it, nothing happens. Maybe it's fear. Death Cab: Fear is the heart of love, so I never went back..

Times are getting hard. No I wont be a school robot, ken. Will never be like I was once before, everything evolve, change can't be stopped. Today I'm someone, tomorrow a little something else has been added to that, every memomory in our bank adds to who we are. Today, tomorrow, it's all a perspective of time. By the time we get through, the world will never ever be the same.

Discussed urges at english. It was kinda interesting. Rape was one of the manly urges. What if we would say just what we wanted? Do what we wanted. Chaos?

Hello Saferide - Long Lost Penpal Lyrics

Hello
Do you remember me
I am your long lost pen pal
It must have been ten years ago we last wrote
I don't really know what happened
I guess life came in the way
Let me know if you're still alive
Let me know if you ever used that knife or not

Hello
Yes I remember you
I've got a husband and two children now
I work as an accountant and make fairly good money
I still have your letters, you used a pink pen to write them
And you would comfort me
when my tears would stain the ink
And I would send you mix tapes with Kate Bush on

I have to admit I sometimes lied in those letters
Tried to make life better than it was
I still wasn't kissed at sixteen
And I still need a friend

There was this letter
I never told you this back then
But it would be fair to say it saved my life
I sat in the window
The only one left out from a party again
Pretty sure I didn't have a single friend
Then I checked the mailbox

Dear long lost penpal
I was lying the whole time
I'm really a 46 years old man named Luke
I have three children
and a wife, she doesn't care
And I hope you don't resent me
And I hope you do not hate me
For trying to find my way back to what it's like to be young

I have to admit I sometimes lied in those letters
Tried to make life better than it was
I still wasn't kissed at sixteen
And I still need a friend

It's a very beautiful song. That one, Hey there Delilah, 9 crimes, Little Lies, Into the Dark, Amie... all perfect autumn songs, in the beautiful, clear, afternoon sunlight, in the chilly wind and dancing yellow leaves, what brings me sorrow and comfort at the same time, hope and despair...

I'm crying right now. When typing this. I'm just depressed sometimes, that's all. I'm inside a cube. Everyone is standing outside, the sound of faint laughing, they're having fun, they can see me but they think I'm good, they think I'm allright. They don't see the glass, the cube, the prison, and so, they can't break it, break in. They will always be on the other side of the glass. I'm sorry, everyone reading this, no one has ever reached me. Never come all the way. My cube is constant. I've described it as the wall of china once, but no one saw that either. Can't climb, can't break. Will I forever be in this state? I can tell some things, others I can't. Always a matter of how much truth people can take. Some can take more, some can take less. I can hurt badly. I can get badly hurt. I can cause things. Truth. Can end friendships, or cause major harm. And I will probably regret writing this aswell. It's like drunkdialling. You will probably regret it. And writing when you're depressed for no apparent reason... It will probably just be fucked up, it will probably be called silly emo by friends, it will probably just be seen as bullshit. Depression isn't reasonable. Writing is better than cutting atleast. Somewhere out there, there might be someone who understands.

30 seconds to Mars

I'm writing a song. It is a dedicated song, but I don't know. Maybe I'm hallucinating. Tell a tale by a smile, that's what you do.

Anyways. I have loads of inspiration - apart from the oh so very inspiring biology test coming up. I'm in love with my iPod. I know, I have been for a very long time now, but it's really now I've realised how much the music means to me.

Boys Like Girls - Broken Man

I want to scream, until no sound comes out and you've learned your lesson
I want to swallow these pills to get to sleep
So I don't have to make a bad impression

I need to start to be myself
Cause I'm sick of everybody else

I won't let you bring me down
It's here and now I'm breaking out
I will learn to love again
But I will stand a broken man

I wanna run, but only far enough to make you miss me
I wanna take back all the shit that I have done
But I guess you were better off without me

I need to start to be myself
Cause I'm sick of everybody else

I won't let you bring me down
It's here and now, I'm breaking out
I will learn to love again
But I will stand a broken man

I took one big step and I looked away
And then I thought of all the things that I wanted to say
I'm always too late
You never got your story straight
I'm always up late
I think I'm everything you hate

Also listening a lot to 30 SECONDS TO MARS, amazingly wonderful. Oblivion especially, and The Kill. Under the burning sun, I take a look around...

Set apart from all the clones

lyssnar på punk rock princess (something corporate) och renegade cavalcade (ash)

Maybe when the room is empty,
Maybe when the bottle's full.
Maybe when the door gets broke down,
Love can break in.

If you could be my punk rock princess,
I would be your garage band king.
You can tell me why you just dont fit in
And how you're gonna be something

nanana, perfect mood. :) Love it. Loved the party sosso! :) lyckat, trevliga männsikor. Even though I cried in the end (paaaaiiin) I had a great time. Alex, you're the best! :)

And it feels like a dirty dream
Like I'm walking to the guillotine
Feel the voodoo in my brain
Sipping on a hurricane
How's it feel to be a freak?
Oh so pale and so unique
To walk lonely in the rain
Unashamed that we are not the same

How does it feel to be alone?
Set apart from all the clones
We're the ones who can't be tamed
Who go against the grain

We are all looking

Weeii new music to listen to :D:D Boys like girls, 30 seconds to mars, anna ternheim skiva, secondhand serenade och cute is what we aim for :D:D

"Me, You And My Medication" - Boys like Girls

Found my way to the highway, I don't wanna tell you the state I'm in
I've had too much to smoke, too much to drink, where have I been?
I feel like the stars are getting closer and the sky is closing in
And I don't know where to begin

We're all looking for something, to take away the pain

Me, and you, and my medication
(Making the best of it)
Love is just a chemical creation
(Will it be permanent?)
Synthetic sensation
Me, you, and my medication

The way back to the right track, maybe you can help me find the door
Is it too much to ask, too much too fast, too much to ignore?
It feels like your body's getting closer but you seem so far away
Medicine make it ok

We're all looking for someone, to take away the pain

We're all addicted to something, that takes away the pain

All words are worth something...

I feel like Hamlet. I'm neither active nor inactive. Failing to achieve any purpose.

Varför låter jag det gamla komma upp igen? Det var ett år sedan ungefär. varför låter jag det få makt över mig igen, göra mig svag, deprimerad... se det varje dag framför mig, ibland givet hopp, för att krossas lika snabbt. jag är fett korkad, dum i huvet.. jag vill inte att det ska vara så, ibland intalar jag mej att det inte är så, ibland känner jag mej bara galen, ibland undrar jag om det inte bara är my mind playing tricks on me.. sedan finns det andra sidor. vad välja? nej inte så. skiftar från dag till dag. ena dagen upp i solen, andra dagen gömd bakor sopor. fan vad jag har mycket sopor! så jävla mycket skit i huvet. borde rensas bort, bort, bort.. jag gömde mig idag, sen fick jag hopp, sen krossades det som vanligt, sen blev jag neutral.. vad är fel för fan? gissa vad ni vill vad det rör sig om. ingen kommer ändå få veta något som leder åt det ena eller det andra. som jag sagt innan, vissa saker är bara för komplicerade för att få ord. People don't hate history, they hate their own history. det är vad jag har, fancy quotes och tankar. skrivandet tycks långt borta från mig nu, verkar inte röra på sig. så mycket jag, jag, jag överallt att JAG blir galen. utplåna självet, önskar JAG var buddhist. schulman, jag har aldrig läst din blogg, men jag är säker på att vad du än skrev så borde du inte lagt ner din blogg. alla ord är värda att få yttras. även om de orden inte är du, även om orden som inte är du kommer ur din mun, så är de värda att yttras. Yttras, föras vidare genom skrift, tal, fågel, fisk, eller mittemellan, välj själv, ett skepp kommer lastat. Med ord. med många biljontals ord som varje dag förmedlar vad som finns eller inte finns inuti våra förvirrade huvuden. we make up our minds about so many things. about what is beautiful and not, what is important and not, what is love and what it is NOT. who we love and NOT. beginning to sound like a Borat-parrot. sorry. men jag vet inte. vi lever i våra fina ramar, perspektiv på verkligheten, skriver fina bloggar och förmedlar oss så tjusigt. vad kommer det ner till?? slutligen. här är me. meh. ehehe. vi bestämmer var vi sätter punkt eller komma, vad som kan sägas och inte sägas, vad som är andra, vad som är jag. vad som kan publiceras, rubriceras, exponeras, planteras, utvärderas. vi går till skolan, vi går till jobbet, vi går till begravningen. om det inte är vår begravning då vill säga. vad om bitarna däremellan? vad om ord som ingen yttrar, sanning vi aldrig kan nå? varför kan vi inte vara helt och hållet öppna och sanna, undrar hur många hjärnmutationer det skulle finnas då. alla skulle totalt kollapsa i ett hav av sanningar. jag vill göra det. säga allt. jag tror på närhet, jag har upplevt den, söker den ständigt, förlorar den alltid. här är jag och där är du. vi är så jävla separerade att det inte är sant. EXAKT!! det är falkst. och nu fick jag slut på ord, om jag vore en poet, om JAG kunde skriva sonetter flytande (vilket skämt) så skulle jag göra detta till en vacker rapsong, blanda in lite reggae beats, techno pump, akustisk gitarr, spröd gothsång och blanda allt i en härligt eklektisk mix och servera med min favoritchoklad smält ovanpå. jag måste sova nu, och imorgon kommer jag säkert bara tycka att den här texten är sjukt pinsam och radera allting.. om jag orkar dvs. Sagt om IB: jag skulle begå självmord, men jag är för upptagen... that is the truth of today. jag är för upptagen för att skriva sånt här skit, så egentligen har det inte skrivits alls, eller hur? jag har suttit och gjort franskaglosorna hela tiden. inte ett ord om de här orden till någon, förstått?

It could be worse, right?

Heroes: We are the sum of our fears...

Alex Evans is hot. And yes I just wrote so I will get more emo hits at google. If I don't already. I haven't actually tried googling anything concerning my blog.. But since I'm not a sponsor of Google I'm probaby not very high on the list. Heh.

Dedicated to anyone who cares (from Secondhand Serenade - Vulnerable, thanks nis ^^):

Share with me the blankets that your wrapped in
because its cold outside cold outside its cold out side
share with me the secrets that you kept in
because its cold inside cold inside its cold inside

... but mostly I just run away

NOTHING NOBODY RIGHT&WRONGS (FROM TINGSEK)
Taking care of all sorts of things in my way. I'm gonna have to wash all my clothes today. I paid some old bills not seen since I last missed 'em going throught my so called system on & on & on.

Coffee and a cigarette..the finest I could ever get. Just sitting here singing songs about nothing nobody right&wrongs.

I passed on to another room where everything looks different I could use som mild assistance now I forgot about what I was gonna do so help me to express I need to settle & confess. There's so many things I'd like to say but mostly I just run away...then suddenly my truth just lies there. I'm living it again, so definite it always wins so forever lost in everything I always do. I used to be so scared about that too.

Vill de spendera tid med mig? Nej det verkar inte så.
Gillar de mig? Kanske.
Överdriver jag? Kanske.