When talking to Garrett I realised something. He asked "You're not very good with relationships in general, are you?" referring to some expired friendships. Shrugging, I answered "It's good with the people I really care about". And it couldn't be more true. The people who really matter are the ones who stay with you no matter what happens. And they have. And they will.
I'm compliant in that way. Show me affection, and I'll show you. Give me love, and I will give back. Give me shit and I will repay in kind. It's always been like that. At one point I called it "Chameleon" because it's a matter of following others feelings, of adapting to the color of the moment. Nästan lite som att vända kappan efter vinden, if you will. But it's not really like that either. But what's the point of giving love to someone who doesn't seem to appreciate it?
It's the second day of this new year, and I've already started making resolutions to myself. With the morning cigarette and the beautiful winter sun came the defiant feeling that "I will never belong to anyone". The feeling of being a wild animal, never being caught, escaping every trap. Wild and free and defiant, crazy and glowing and... Wild. Predator. You can't catch me. And I will never belong. Anywhere or to anyone.
