Even though it hurts... I don't care if I loose my mind...
Do you know what I really want? I want to walk into a crowded room, see the hottest guy I've ever seen in my entire life, a guy who makes my heart speed up like mad, and think "there he is, the man I'm going to marry" and then get him and live happily ever after. That is precisely what I am longing for. Butterflies, a feeling, something. But my heart is empty.
Except for family then. Family is always first. I love my sisters above anything. I tell them that every chance I get. And I kiss mom and tell her how amazing she is. And how proud I am to be part of this family. This unique, weirdo, chaotic, magical family.
This life I lead now is pretty sweet. Apart from the mistakes I make at work, which are murder. Sometimes I get the feeling that I'm like a chihuahua trying to trample water in the middle of the Pacific. I have barely any free days now. So many working days. It's kinda stressful.
I have no money on my cell phone, so everyone writing me, I am not ignoring you. I just can't be bothered to refill. And yes, I am very lazy these days, don't do more than I have to. I blame it on work. I blame it on being tired and having to rest. And I blame it on my escapist-loving mind which makes me stay in bed all day reading or waste my nights in front of movies. Speaking of movies, 17 again was a pretty decent movie. Zac Effron is so nice to look at...
